Are You Good?

“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22, NIV).

Alonzo

Solomon may have been a womanizer, but this particular verse really hit the nail on the head. Ladies, do you know you are a good thing? Do you know that you are the embodiment of favor?

When I was thinking about what to write today (at 12 am, mind you), this verse came to my mind– it is popular, but I am never sure where it is exactly; but thank God for the Holy Spirit for directing to the correct passage! I read this verse and it dawned on me that I am a good thing and I bring favor to my husband. That’s pretty awesome!

Some of you may say, “But you’re not good. Even Jesus questioned someone calling Him good in Luke 18:19.” And I will say you’re right. In and of myself, in my own human nature, I am not good; far from it, even. But, because I am in Christ and He is in me, because God Himself lives in me through the Holy Spirit, dare I say that I am indeed good?

I looked at the verse in different versions to see how “good thing” was translated. For the most part it remained “good thing”, but NLT used “a treasure”, and NET used “enjoyable”.  So, ladies, know today that you are a good thing, but only through the grace and power of Jesus Christ.

To be a good thing, you need to look at the life of Jesus because we know God through Him (John 14:6). What does it mean to be good? Assess yourself; compare yourself to Jesus. Do you love? Do you forgive seventy times seven times? Do you desire and allow only God’s will to be done? Are you self sacrificing? Do you teach or lead those around you in the way of the Lord? Do you obey God at all times? Are you uncompromising when it comes to the things of God?  Are you clothed in humility? Are you steadfast and persevering in suffering? Are you prayerful? How’s your faith? Do you return all glory to God or take some for yourself? Are you a servant? Are you about your Father’s business? These are just some of the things that come to mind when I look at Jesus and who He is.

Practically, too, ask yourself: can I cook? can I keep a clean house? can I pray for my husband? can I support my husband? can I submit to my husband? can I work hard? can I get up early in the morning to prepare breakfast for my family? can I serve the poor? how’s my intuition? can I respect my husband? can I raise my children in the way of the Lord?

Ladies, to be a good thing is a high calling. My question is: are you up for it? God called you a helper (Genesis 2:18) for your man. You have a high calling on your life as a servant of God, a woman, a wife, a mother, a sister, and a friend.  But understand that you cannot do it on your own! It takes the grace of God and His grace is definitely sufficient for you (2nd Corinthians 12:9).

Another revelation that I got from reading this verse is the fact that you are a favor from God to your husband! You are that special gift from God! Like, what?!?! So, yeah, you’re kind of a big deal. Relish in that!

Single? Married? Spinster? You are a big deal. You are favor from God to your brothers, husbands, etc. So, whenever the devil tries to get you in a mindset that will get you down, know that you are good because God lives in you, you are a gift someone out there is waiting and praying for; you are favor, someone cherish-able, love-able, admirable.

Are you good?! I know I am!

Dear Single People,

“He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the Lord” (Psalm 113:9, NIV).

This post is not about parenting but I believe it captures what I want to talk about.

If you think you’ve been “barren” for too long, I want to encourage you today that God is able to take you out of that barrenness and make you flourish! That’s it. That’s the message.

But let me ask you: how many announcements of engagements, weddings, babies, etc. have you seen in the last month? For me, I can count at least 5. While you may be happy for these people, perhaps you’ve heard a tiny voice at the back of your mind asking you, “When will it be your turn?”  Please don’t entertain that voice; it won’t get you anywhere. Trust me, I know.

Yes, I do not know how long you’ve been waiting (and please know that I am not trying to be insensitive) but understand that God can even bring your spouse right now in He wants, so don’t lose heart. Waiting requires patience. I believe God is preparing you and your spouse for something great (and also challenging because marriage is no joke)! Look at the thought and beauty of Creation! God prepared things Adam needed before He created Adam. Imagine if Adam was created first; I reckon he would have been in the way, giving God his opinions on how things should be — why? Because that’s what human beings do; we try to suggest to God how He should do things… but I digress. Anyway, God saw that Adam needed a “helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18, NIV), so He created Eve from and for Adam, and my dude said, ” ‘At last!’ ” (Genesis 2:23, NLT). In other words, Adam praised God for the special and specific beauty God created especially for him, even more than he praised God for everything else.

So, friends, relax! God knows when and why you need a spouse. When it comes to God’s timing, know that He is never late and never early but ALWAYS on time. Biological clock has nothing on you; ask Sarah! God is able, sisters! When your husband sees you, he too will say ” ‘At last! This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh!’ ” (Genesis 2:23, NLT). Wouldn’t you rather hear that than something else– like, “Oh… this is it? I expected more, God.”

Today, I have a new found knowledge, peace, and happiness. I want the same for you, friends! Getting to this point hasn’t been easy; it’s taken me almost a year! But I don’t want that for you. Although I haven’t been waiting too long, I’m secure knowing that leaving everything in my Father’s hands is best. He knows the best for me, so I ain’t go no worries! 🙂 🙂 🙂

My friends, when you leave everything in God’s hands, simply let it go. He’s able to do something great with it, for you.

I Don’t Feel Like It

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power” (Ephesians 6:10, NIV).

Ring- for blog post

He put a ring on it!

No, I’m not engaged… yet, but God put a ring on it! The ring is symbolic of my commitment to Him; it reminds me that I am His first and always before I am my husband’s.

I wear the ring on Wednesdays because I like Wednesdays; I choose to dress up, be girly, be reminded of my commitment to God (not that I am not reminded everyday)… Today was different, though, because I didn’t feel like doing all of that; I was a bit angry with God. Praying was like pulling teeth, thanksgiving was even worse; quiet time was hard to do.

But while talking to God about why I didn’t want to do anything today, I believe God spoke to me and said: When you’re married, what would you do when you don’t feel like being a wife? I thought about it and wondered whether I would run away or give my husband the ring back. But I learned a lesson in my discourse with God: it’s not about the ring, but the person. It is not about the ring but the person.

My commitment to God should not be about a ring I put on my finger or the level of happiness I feel; it should not be about whether or not God gives me the million dollars I’ve been praying for or the 2017 Mercedes-Benz E-Class. What if I never get those things, would I say “Forget you, God”? No. The lesson: my commitment to God is not based on whether I feel like committing; it is based on His character: the steadfastness, the faithfulness, the great love, the kindness, the righteousness, the holiness, the goodness, the justice. It is always about who He is.

Bringing this to marriage, although I am not married yet, I now know that, by God’s grace, when I don’t feel like being a wife, I won’t take my ring off or stop cooking for my husband– regardless, my status as a wife won’t change based on my feelings. Being married is a commitment– love is a decision backed by action. So, I will commit and still love, respect, honor, and submit to my husband because he is God’s choice for me. I will (must) remember who he is, his character, why God chose him for me, his love for me, etc.

A lot of us don’t feel like doing a lot of things, but we want the results of those things, right? But, imagine if God deals with us based on His feelings! My friends, let us continue to commit to God regardless of our feelings– this is not to say that our feelings do not matter to God. Let us continue in our relationship with him, knowing that His strength and mighty power is at work in us; that He is indeed God. And this will extend to all our other relationships.

Heart Matters

“the Lord has sought out a man after his own heart and appointed him leader of his people…” (1st Samuel 13:14, NIV).

I think we can all agree that the heart of anyone is very important because our actions start in the heart– it’s all a process, you know. The heart matters. I think of the song that says Lord, I give you my heart… When we give God our hearts, that means we hand over our totality to Him alone, knowing that He will mold it and remold it and polish it to become like His; and the end goal of our surrender is that we look more like Him, showcasing Him to this broken world. So, what does all this have to do with me?

Well, I love the heart! When discussions of matters of the heart come up I get excited because I just want to glean from people, and grow; I also want to be aware of the state of my heart, checking to see if it aligns with God’s own heart– I desire to be a woman after God’s heart!. And when it comes to relationships, not just romantic ones, even friendships, I pray that the heart of the person I am interacting with is aligned with God.

At the end of the day, though, when thinking about my future, I want my husband to be a man after God’s heart. Think about it: if the man is the head of the house as Christ is the head of the church (Ephesians 5:23), wouldn’t you want him to be led by the Spirit of God? I desire a husband whose heart and will and totality will be conformed to the will of God so much so that God will look at him and say this is my son, in whom I am well pleased.

Why was David the greatest king in Israel? Because he was a man after God’s heart– that’s a very high calling! To be a man (or woman) after God’s heart means recognizing who God is, His unchanging character, His steadfast love. It means living in the fear of the Lord. It means surrendering your life to Him. It means hating what He hates and loving what He loves. It means living by faith and not by sight. It means leading those entrusted to you with the realization of your accountability for them. It means accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior and King. It means living a worship lifestyle. It means seeking first the kingdom of God, knowing that He will give you all you need. It means gazing upon the beauty of God. It means seeking Him for the rest of your life. It means that when you mess up you know you have a Father who will forgive you and receive you back. It means lifting up your eyes to God when trouble comes. It means walking in your destiny, knowing that God is with you and for you. In a nutshell, it means following your Shepherd like the sheep that you are, trusting that His thoughts and plans for you are of good and not of evil, to give you hope and a future with and in Him (Jeremiah 29:11).

It’s a high calling, alright. But like Paul said, “I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13, NIV). So, I want my husband to be a man after God’s heart. My prayer for him is that he surrenders his heart to God and just allows God to lead him. I want my husband, my king, to be led by my Father because then we will never go wrong– after all, “those who are led by the Spirit of God are the sons of God” (Romans 8:14, NIV). I want a marriage that will reflect God Himself; what better way to do that than to look upon the One we are trying to conform to.

So, husband, I give God your heart. I pray that you will surrender to Him alone. I pray that God will be Lord over you and me and our marriage and our children. In Jesus name, amen!

Funny… I was going to write about waiting. Guess my heart has just been poured out. Look at God!!

Dear Husband,

Waiting for you hasn’t always been the easiest thing but I do know that it will be rewarding.

I know that God took me from your side for a reason, and I’ve been wondering what that reason is. You have already been chosen for me, by God Himself, which makes me happy because then I know that I won’t make a mistake– neither will you.

Do you know what I envision for us, to chase after God together, to raise our children in the love of Christ, modeling for them God’s vision! Are you on board with me, my love? I envision a marriage filled with service and love, honor and respect.

This love story of ours is epic! God is writing it, so why won’t it be awesome? ;):)

Anyway, that’s it! I had the urge to write to you. I hope one day you’ll read this and smile.

I am yours, darling, and you are mine.

Love you so much!

With love and eager expectation,
Your one and only Queen!

Rejected? How Long Will I Mourn?

“The Lord said to Samuel, ‘How long will you mourn for Saul…’ ” (1st Samuel 16:1, NIV)

Rejection? I know it. I think a lot of us have been rejected at least once in our lives; some people deal with it better than others. As for me, I hate it, but by God’s grace I’m learning to pick myself back up and keep moving on in the strength of God. Still, rejection sucks, especially on the romantic end of things.

I have had my own share of rejection when it comes to guys. I have had one relationship– the other one that I would’ve considered a relationship, the guy at the end of the day said there was never a relationship (that’s another topic for another time). Neither of them chose me. It hurt. When something like that happens it messes with you. How can someone who made grand promises of love and affection one day turn around and act as if you never mattered? What’s worse? Continue reading “Rejected? How Long Will I Mourn?”