“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:12-13, NIV).
I thought I had already learned this… but no; just learned it overnight. We must be content in every aspect of our lives. An author says this, “The Bible has a great deal to say about contentment—being satisfied with what we have, who we are, and where we’re going” (http://www.gotquestions.org/Bible-contentment.html). I have learned to be satisfied with who I am (a woman with physical and emotional scars; I am short; I have one eye that’s “lazy”; I love to sing, cook, clean, write, etc). I am satisfied with where I am going (my future and destination are secured in God’s hands). What I have been having problems with is what I have! I don’t think I have a lot, according to me (but I have A LOT more than other people in other parts of the world).
WHY AM I NOT SATISFIED/CONTENT WITH WHAT I HAVE?
Perhaps it’s because I had an expectation that is not being met; perhaps it’s because I feel like God has forgotten about me, or that He has given me the short end of the stick… I don’t know…
But, I thank God that (and I think it’s for real this time) I have learned contentment. I had a dream overnight, and all I did was help people send emails. The joy that was in my heart was out of this world! I woke up (and, actually, went to sleep) with the song “Background”, by Lecrae, in my head; I felt as if God was telling me, “Dayo, what if I want you to stay in the background?” The answer was yes. Perhaps I have been feeling as though God doesn’t want to use me anymore, so I have been feeling overlooked (in every aspect of my life); I have been feeling like an afterthought, not because of man, but because I didn’t feel useful to God anymore! So, I have been craving prominence, wanting to be in the foreground, hoping that God would notice me and decide to use me again… how messed up is that?!?! I was subconsciously trying to manipulate my Maker… 😥
That was yesterday! I praise God because I have learned to be satisfied with where He has me! There is a reason for it. I can truly say, with confidence, what Paul was saying, that he can do ALL THINGS– even being content– because God granted him strength and grace! I wonder what the journey was like for him. God is an awesome teacher! He taught me this lesson in the most gentle and humbling way.
I am now looking at things differently!